Blog of Mary Muia, SI UN Representative in Nairobi.
Another Child Bride: My Education Journey as a Girl in Rural Africa.
I have always loved school. My relationship with learning has always been positive. I have had the privilege to access education to University level despite the unfortunate circumstances in my early childhood. At the age of seven, I lost both parents and my grandmother fostered me with my four siblings. I have three sisters and a brother whom I treasure dearly. My grandmother in her advanced age did all she could to bring us up as her own children. I recall her struggling with my uncles who advocated that I and my sisters be taken to orphanage because we are “just girls” after all. My grandmother stood up for us, a soroptimist by action she was, even though she had no idea of the existence of soroptimists movement.
I am proud to have been named after my grandmother; hence we shared a special bond as namesakes. She passed away while I was in Form two during my high school. Her spirit and legacy are my source of energy to protect and empower vulnerable adolescent girls and young women through education. I always enjoyed being in her company whenever she decided to go anywhere, I would naturally be the one she would tag alone to keep her company.
Most are the days when we lacked food. During drought periods, we could sleep without a meal for days. My grandmother would always cheer me up by saying: “when you complete school, you will support our needs and buy us plenty of clothes and shoes”. This motivated me very much and I worked hard to one day, afford a good meal, clothes and shoes for my sibling and our loving grandmother.
Kawethei primary school, in Kangundo sub county in Machakos County, Kenya is where I attended my primary level schooling. This is a church-based community school. Through the congregation, there were well-wishers/sponsors who supported us from poor households with a pair of school uniform annually and one meal per day. My sisters and I were identified as needy children and were lucky to be admitted to this support project. I am grateful to this day to this congregation. The sponsors were from abroad, so we learned this as we grew older in the school system. I vividly remember the head teacher guiding us to write thank notes/letters to the supporting families who contributed to this aid project.
My grandmother engaged in peasant farming, more often than not, adverse weather and lack of adequate rains ended with no harvest for long periods. This meant the lack of food was the order of my childhood with my siblings. This did not discourage my determination to go to school and learn how to read and write. I always admired reading story books to know what others experienced away from my reality then.
I had the honour to have teachers who cared about us as though we were their own children, praised us when we did our homework and treated us like their real children. Healthy relationship between teachers and their students is a critical aspect of good teaching because they make students feel like they belong. Especially students from poor settings like I was. My only hope was in excelling in education. An educational environment is a second home for children from poor households. As such, students who have teachers with good qualities form a deep relationship with learning that becomes a part of who they are. I should add as well that this can only become truer for students from poor backgrounds in many parts across Africa. This was true for me.
On completing my primary level education at the age of fourteen, I had the most exciting news. Yet, I was distraught to receive the news of having excelled with top grades to proceed to high school. My fear was how will grandmother raise the required school fees and shopping for personal effects to take me to the prestigious girls boarding school three hours walk from our homestead. One Saturday morning, as I was sweeping the compound to clear the dry leaves fallen from the mango’s trees in the homestead, two seventy years old men walked to towards grandmother’s homestead. I was terrified to see the strange old men in our compound that early. I quickly ran inside to alert my grandmother of the strange visitors. She came outside to talk to them. My heart was in my mouth when I heard my grandmother raise her voice to state that “She will go to school”. My heart raced, I gripped the thorny broom in both my hands. Wondering why would my grandma be upset with the strangers, had they come to do harm? It did not sound like the strangers’ visit was with good intention. Rather, years later I learned that my grandmother resisted the two old men’s offer to take me as a child bride. In her true element, once more she stood up to protect me from being “Just Another Child Bride”. Her determination, to see me through education to high school was mammoth without her, I would have not stepped into a high school. My grandmother chose to secure my future through education when all the odds really were against her due to poverty.
Through education, I have unlocked the power to dream big, to challenge myself, and to make a positive impact on the world. Looking back, I am grateful for all the memories I have created and the lessons I have learned. Education is not just about acquiring knowledge; it is about becoming a well-rounded individual who can make a difference.
